Fear & The Prospect of Angels

Fear is such a poorly made coat
Ragged cuffed and thread bare
At the elbows and shoulders.
I would hope to see you
More warmly dressed
In a hand knit sweater
Created stitch by stitch
With you in mind

Fear acts as if it is something
Of importance or substance,
Giving off the illusion of fullness 
Like a 7-Eleven Big Gulp 
Or a bathtub filled with iceberg lettuce 
I would rather for you                                                                                                                
A ripe plum
Or a tall glass of cool water
Something sweet and real 
That pulls up a moan of pleasure
And satisfies all that’s been hollow or hungry. 

Before we were born
Before we floated in our mothers’ womb
We both swam in the inner ocean
Of the Beloved
And if we could only know the truth of this
We might recognized one another
As the old friends we are.
And yet                                                                                                                                            
Fear is a growling animal
A song with on note
And dangerous when cornered.
I would hope for you a bird
That sat riding on your shoulder
All day long
Delighting you with how                                                                                                     
Many many songs it knows
That occasionally flutters into the air
Wings quickening                                                                                                                  
Softly and beautifully beating,                                                                                             
Like a heart when it hears the one voice                                                                                
Its been waiting forever to hear
A flash of what angels must sound like
When they pass by 
So near
As they so often do. 


What might happen if the next time you noticed a fear holding you back from some small (start small) connection, you stopped and listened for the humming of something gracious and true in your life? Perhaps remember a time when you took a step forward when it felt a little risky and it worked out in a beautiful way?

Did it help you have to confidence to take that small step toward connection? If not…what might be helpful?

Laying my hand on your heart and saying “oh honey” always helps me 🙂

Carrie Newcomer’s song, “Singing in the Dark” from her newest album, A Great, Wild Mercy

Carrie Newcomer is an American singer, songwriter and author. She has produced 19 solo CDs and has received numerous awards for her music and related charitable activities. She has collaborated with numerous authors, academics, philosophers and musicians. She co-hosts Growing Edge, a podcast, with Parker Palmer. In 2009 and 2011 she traveled to India as a cultural ambassador, including musical performances organized by the US State Department. In 2012 she made a similar trip to Kenya on behalf of the Interfaith Hunger Initiative. Her range of causes, activities, collaborations and philosophies significantly influences her music. Newcomer was called “a prairie mystic” by the Boston Globe. Her insightful, creative weekly newsletter is A Gathering of Spirits.